Jim found floating down Nile. Picked up by Pharaoh. Dropped by Pharaoh.
Paul and Mike successfully evolve from plant life.
Greg poked through his outer protective gelatinous shell and breached sunlight for the first time.
1969 - 1988
No evidence of intelligent life available. Paul swears he was in Krokus during this period, but that does not change things even if it's true.
1989 - 1994
Mike and Greg team up to create the ultra-bombastic METAL band Killswitch. Jim joins Killswitch in 1993. They had several fans.
1994 - 1997
Mike, Paul, and Jim formed The Piñatacocks, formerly the Rula Lenska Trio. Former members include Pia Zadora, Kendall Bush, Zero Mostel, Andy and Mickey Rooney, two of the Andrews Sisters, Ladybird Johnson (pre and post Playboy), Rev. Al Sharpton (on horns), Chief J. Strongbow, and the guy who sang Double Dutch Bus.
1998 - 2000
Greg joined the Piñatacocks in 1998 and was promptly dismissed a few months later (see Asshole vs. Cocks circa 1998). Enter Shannon Kennedy, a much pinker/wetter style ensued, and the band changed it's name to Bodice. Several gigs, a 4 song EP (inquire within, thousands remain untouched), and considerable financial obligations later, Shannon departs, finding the grease greener in Minnesota.
2000 - ????
Greg rejoins the newly re-re-re-re-re-remonikered Redmond and Jim assumes lead vocal duties (which frankly, he was born for). Redmond released their CD, "Measure of One" and look forward to mating with each and every one of you.